So, I got moved to a different client at work. "Consider this a promotion," my boss said. So I did. For about 2 minutes. There is this woman that is...how do I describe her position...let's just say the "client concierge." This is a big client, so the woman's job is to keep her happy. The woman's job is NOT to weasel her ass into my projects, but lo and behold, she does. All. the. time. I want to throw pointed objects at her head.
She's one of those people that has the fake, falsetto, "sunshine" voice. She's also apparently gone to some kind of management training, because I swear-to-God, if she utters one more "bingo" word i'm going to beat her. She's all "out of the box," and "Let's just ensure our customer is happy, happy, happy!" Like I said: Die, woman, die. Don't get me wrong--I am all about keeping the customer happy. I will bend over backwards and take a con-call whilst making dinner for my family, but i am NOT a blow-sunshine-up-your-ass type of person. I don't tell the customer what they WANT to hear--I tell them the truth. I don't set up false expectations. I do, however, get the job done, and give them what they want.
Yesterday, Crazy MicroManager actually told us (3 of us handle this account) that it was unfair to the creative team to ask them to burn 6 cds in 24 hours. "That kind of thing causes dissention among the team! It's just not healthy!" PUKE. If we can't burn six frickin' cds for a $2.5 million dollar client, I'LL do the client a favor and direct them to somebody that can. Sweet baby Jesus.
I'm a project manager. I have LOTS of experience. Someone please hire me before I become a convicted killer.