Apr 27, 2009


Okay, so i didn't update after last week. I didn't get that job. Yeah, THAT job--the one that i had THREE interviews for. The one where, on my last interview, the lady said, "GREAT!! The next step is to just verify your references!" Are you freaking kidding me??

Well, good for me, i have 2 more interviews this week. One tomorrow at 9am, and one on Wednesday at 9am. I'm being rotten because i want to continue to work from home. After 4 years of it, i'm spoiled. Plus, my gosh, do you know how much more money i'm going to have to make if i go to an office?? I'll have to pay for daycare for 2 kids! I don't know how people do it--it's ridiculously expensive! I'm going to have to get two jobs just to pay for it!

*grumble grumble*

Apr 15, 2009

Job interview 2.0

So, job interview 2.0 went wonderfully...I think. I think it went well, but who knows what the other person thought. Personally, i believe that they should like me--not only because i know a whole heck of a lot about what they want me to do but because i refuse to capitalize any 'i' that i may type.

So, if i get this job, which i really hope i do, i'll have to go back to an office. UGH. (Not complaining...i'm just SAYING). Clairey will have to go back to Ms. Dot's, wherein she will be feed copious amounts of crap. Yep, back to normal.

ay yi yi.

Apr 10, 2009

Job interview 1.5

The interview has moved to next Tuesday...stay tuned.

I've been having some weird-ass dreams lately, and it's all Facebook's fault. Getting in touch with all my old classmates has introduced a whole new set of people into my dreams.

Last night I dreamed about a scene from "Barefoot in the Park," that I did with my friend Aaron. I remember the theatre class was laughing at me because there was a part where we were yelling at each other, and my voice kept getting higher and higher. I turn into a pipsqueak when i'm yelling, which is why i DO NOT yell when fighting. If you sound like a baby chick, it's just not powerful enough when trying to get your point across. Anyway, it was Aaron and I doing our duet scene, then people left us fanmail in a box. Weird.

Apr 9, 2009

Job Interview 1.0

Okay, so i have phone interview #2 on Friday. Friday, as in, TOMORROW Friday. I'm slightly nervous, slightly not. Kind of uncommitted in my thoughts, if you will. The most exciting thing about it is that if I get it, I'll have money again. AND, I'll be forced to buy new clothes, and with new clothes come shoes. YEE!! You see, for the past nearly 5 years, i've been working from home. In MY office (downstairs to the left of the front door), my dresscode is strictly yoga pants and tank tops, or my favorite "Ireland Rugby" shirt which has been worn so often that the writing has faded into nothing. Bare feet are essential. I'm guessing that if I get this job, i'll have to wear real clothes. Going braless with a tank top is not going to be allowed. I mean, they didn't SAY that, but i'm just guessing.

I haven't worn "office" clothes in such a long time, i'm not even sure what to buy. I mean, i'm not the staunch, buttoned-up type. Plus, it's just hard for me to buy clothes. UGH. I'm a white girl with junk in the trunk. Yeah, baby got back, and all that shit. No one makes clothing for curves. Which reminds me...i need to put down these Reese's eggs and run or something. I need to have LESS curves. Rubenesque hasn't been in since the Renaissance. I keep hoping it returns, but i'm running out of hope here.

Anyways, job interview on Friday...fingers crossed.

Apr 8, 2009

Just rambling

If these cats don't freaking stop fighting, i'm going to skin them. I mean, seriously, the bitch cat growls/rowls/hisses at Skin Cat every chance she gets. The Skin has been here since JANUARY! Get used to it, bitch!! It's totally out of control. She's all, "Hey, Skin, let's play....oh, whoops, nevermind...GROWL!!!" They're in the formal dining room and all I can hear is hissing and growling. Sweet Baby Jesus. Enough already.

On my own, personal front, I still haven't found a job. I totally feel like a piece of crap. We need money; therefore, I need a job. No one is hiring--i'm beginning to think all these job postings are just to give us unemployed some hope. And then kill all our dreams. Bastards. I spend my days contemplating doing laundry, yet never do it, because i freaking hate doing laundry.

[excuse me while i go separate the animals]

I now take care of my own pool, which is kind of nice, except it's been damn near arctic (for Texas) the past few days, which just pisses me off. I hate cold weather, it puts me in a shitty mood. Can i just have 90s, please? I mean, come on, it's APRIL for God's sake. The kids swim one day, and the next, the high is 60. WTF is that??

I'm also thinking about what job I might get. Someday. Shit, if anyone ever hires again. I'd love to teach at the college, but holy hell, teachers are SO underpaid. It's damn near pathetic that the people that are building our future get paid what they do. It's ridiculous. On a college-professor salary, I can make my house payment, and possibly, my car payment. That's it. Screw the utilities! No groceries for us! And really, I wouldn't even be able to qualify for food stamps because I own a home and a car. So, the kids would just have to starve. I spent the majority of my high school and college years starving myself, so for me, it's no big deal, but the kids have to eat. Something about child protective services or something...

I also want to write a book. This is not a new idea for me. I actually drew out a storyboard back in good 'ol 1994. I have enough poetry to print a pretty good-size chapbook. I have two or three kid's books written. I have a few ideas spinning around in my head...it seems like everyone's trying to be an author these days, yes? For some reason, I feel compelled to do this, and I feel more entitled to it. How stupid is that? I guess it's because I started thinking about it at such a young age, and then pursued degrees in English Lit. Oooo...ENTITLEMENT. I'm a dumbass. But believing that I have that sense behooves me to do it one day. Again...DUMBASS. Everyone says I should publish portions of this blog ala Dooce, but then I just become another mass-published mommy blogger. That's not what I want. I want something full and literate to be published--not that humorous anecdotes about raising your kids aren't, but I want something MORE than that. Anyway...

Maybe I should write something about being a snarky bitch. Oh wait...that's my blog.

Little Bit aka The Munch aka Clairey doesn't go to the sitter's anymore. I couldn't fathom spending that money each month when I have bills to pay. She's going through withdrawls. Also, Miss Dot feeds her continuously; as in, she might as well just hook up an IV. The kid is CONSTANTLY being fed while over there, and i'm not talking veggie chips and carrot sticks. It's not abnormal for Clairey to eat 5 popsicles while over there. I'll go pick her up, and she's sitting in a recliner with a full-size bag of Funyons while the other kids look at her longingly while they sit on the floor with nothing. I'm SO not kidding. So, while Clairey's home with me, she's on MY food, i.e., yogurt, pretzels, coffee, etc. Dont' worry, i'm not giving her espresso--it's a shot of coffee in a glass of milk. Jeesh. Like I need to stunt her growth anymore. I measured her this morning--she's 5-1/2 and is 41 inches tall. I like to tell people she's a primordial dwarf. Although I force-feed her healthy crap, the kid just ate a carton of strawberry-milkshake whoppers. I don't want her to self-implode or anything, you know? Little by little. It's a 12-step program.

I think i'm going to go look at my laundry.

And this, my peeps, is why I love my friends

This shit cracks me up:
Dramatic Reading of a Break-up Letter

However, the grammar is horrendous. HOW do kids like this make it through English class??