Nov 2, 2012

Can i have some cheese?

I have to hand it to myself. I'm a really positive person. Like, REALLY positive. I rarely let shit get to me. And honestly, I deal with a bunch of shit. I run myself ragged, and am generally one click away from a straight jacket and institutionalization. So...allow me to bitch for a mere moment.

My past two weeks have been nothing short of just plain 'ol, downright, pissy. But here, I get to randomly rant. Aren't you lucky?

Last Tuesday I had my regular 6-month visit to the dermatologist. Where he felt the need to remove 3 more spots on my skin. That, because I count, is a total of 32 skin biopsies since 2003. I've had malignant melanoma 4 times, so I should be used to this. But no matter how brave and nonplussed i try to be, i still worry. So, I worry. In my brain. That's exhausting. Good news is, the doctor called and told me all 3 came back clean. The bad news is, they called while I was at the Ob/Gyn--being told that I had 2 spots in my left breast that needed to be biopsied. I guess more 'good' news is that they move quickly with me because of my fun cancer history. I'm just glad my cervix wasn't involved this time.

So, a few days later (yesterday) I found myself at a boob center getting a double biopsy on Lefty. Easy, right? Not with me. Ever. A simple freaking biopsy ended up taking 4 hours because i would not stop bleeding. For nearly 2 hours, I had nurses taking turns compressing my left boob so hard that I thought my ribs were going to break. There was blood down my arm and all over the floor. Apparently, I have thin blood. And I like to bleed. Yesterday, before they bound me in Ace bandages, I had a hematoma the size of an egg.

The good news? I only got 1 biopsy, it's on my left side (and i'm right handed)...and...stretching here...I got up super early for work because i couldn't sleep. The bad news: I have to go back for the second biopsy, i'm starting to bruise down my left arm, and it hurts to move.

WHY does this shit always happen to me? I suppose because I can "handle" it. What I REALLY want to 'handle', however, is a bottle of wine and a beach vacation. Because this shit sucks goat balls.

Now...feel free to send me some cheese with this 'whine.'

1 comment:

Ang said...

If ever there was a time for wine and whining, I'd say you need no further excuses. I will be praying for you!