May 28, 2010

Claireyisms

Last night, i actually MADE dinner--like a decent, sit-down dinner (we skipped swimteam, so i actually had some time before we left for gym). I had heated up some of that "Uncle Ben's" rice that comes in a bag. You know the kind? You throw the bag in the microwave for 90 seconds and you have rice. It's magically delicious.

Clairey's standing at the counter, waiting for...i don't know...food, and she looks at me and asks, "Why's there a picture of the president on there?"
"On where?"
"Right there," pointing the the bag of rice.

At this point, i'm laughing so hard, i have chicken coming out my nose.

"That's NOT the president."
Clairey looks at me. "Then who is it?"
"It's 'Uncle Ben'."
"HE'S your UNCLE?!!"

We laugh waaaayyyyy too much.

May 25, 2010

Lunch money

Every once in a while, I hop on to the school district's site to check how much money the chicks have in their lunch accounts, and to spy on what they've been purchasing in the school cafeteria. I just checked Clairey's and see that in this month, she has bought ice cream and/or a cookie four times. The rule in this house is, you can get a dessert on Friday. ONLY ON FRIDAY. She knows this rule. Of course, her sister broke the rules, too (but last year). I can't believe i didn't tell you about it.

So, last year, i was checking Jen's account, and i saw that she was buying snacks and cookies at least 2x a week. So, i confronted her about it. She blamed it on the lunch lady. We said, "Seriously. You're telling me that the lunch lady is using your account to buy cookies?" and she looked at me, and said with great conviction, "YES." So, I went on with the questioning, and each time, Jenna would say, "The lunch lady did it."

I changed my strategy. I moved to reverse psychology. I said, "Well, then i guess we'll have to call the school and tell on the lunch lady. That's too bad. She'll probably get fired. She won't be able to feed her family, and they'll end up homeless--living under a bridge. Her babies are going to have to sell their toys, and they'll have to sleep in the cold." I looked at her with sad eyes and loud sighs.

Jenna looked at me and said, "Well, I guess she'll just have to get another job."

My kid. Tender hearted to the extreme. Jeesh.

She finally did admit that she did it, as I knew she had all along.

Anyways, now Clairey's doing the same thing. I think i'm going to tell her that i got a letter from the school telling me that some bad kids have been buying dessert and they aren't supposed to. I'll look at her, give her a big hug, and say, "I'm SO glad you're not one of those bad kids!" She'll fess up immediately. She's a sucker.

May 20, 2010

Working on being awesome

I recently (today---now THAT'S recent) stumbled upon this blog post--30 Habits that Will Change your Life--and i like what this list has to say. Since last October, i've been working really hard on improving myself. However, the past few weeks, i've been inundated with crazines (work, kids' schedules, etc.), and I find myself in a pretty-much constant pissy mood, that I don't like.

So, i'm now, starting today, going to make a point to bring myself up to a whole new level of awesome. I'm a very positive person, but like the rest of us, sometimes i just get caught up in an array of crap. But you know what? Somewhere, someone has way more crap to deal with than I. So i'm letting it go.

May 4, 2010

Oh, it has begun...

Although school is still in session, summer has already begun here in good 'ol Houston, Texas. Swimteam started last week, so we not only have school every day, gymnastics on Tuesdays/Thursdays, dance on Tuesdays, and piano on Thursdays, we also have swimteam every.damn.day.

And it starts at 430. You know, because THAT makes sense. Nevermind that most people have to work. Thank goodness (or not) for smart phones. I can check/answer my email from amidst the chlorinated smell and screaming of 50 kids. It's pure joy, people. PURE JOY. I only wish i could share it with you.

Once school is out--June 2nd--Clairey's gym times move to 12-130pm. Again...HOW does this make sense?? The coaches said, "Oh, it's okay...we have free wi-fi and a room you can use for concalls." Thanks. Are you also going to have an endless supply of coffee, my spaceheater, and a warm cat for my lap? Maybe THEN it would be a good deal. However, i'm not seeing it. If Clairey could see over the dashboard, i'd teach her to drive.

Jenna's going to an "away" camp for a week. All by herself. Frightening. I have a feeling we're going to get there and she's going to freak out. She's supposed to learn how to ride horses, and take care of them. I've conveniently left out the part about how she's going to have to clean up after them, too. I'll let her find that out herself.

If i get to September and i'm still sane, i'm going to throw a party.