If my head wasn't attached to my body....

I have had one of those days. You KNOW those days. The kind where you forget the easiest and most simple tasks, the most mundane things, and the sports bra in your workout bag. You know, THOSE kind.

It's THOSE kinds of days--the kind where you have to wear your "this is not a sports bra" bra to your kickboxing class. Because, really, you COULD go braless, but you'd rather not be cited for eye-gouging. Those days where you work out so hard, that you're sweating like a beer in the desert and swearing like a sailor because you're quite sure that your legs are about to fall off. It's THOSE days that really get to me. The days where you take three exercise classes in a row because DAMMIT! that ass WILL shrink! It's THOSE kind of days.

Now, oh now, my sisters, you will not believe what has conspired from the "having to wear the work bra to kickboxing." I am FREEBOOBING IT. Oh, yes. You read that right: "FREE BOOBING." Oh, there's something there, but it's a "shelf bra." Right now, women all over the world are laughing, because really, what is a shelf bra, but a measly piece of material that covers your boobies with elasticity. Thank God I'm wearing a big, billowy, "peasant blouse" over this horrid shelf bra. My boobies prefer to rest in CUPS, thank you very much.