Jan 6, 2006

Resolutions, Smezolutions

I really don't make New Year's resolutions anymore. Really, it's a waste of my time. I have no idea why I ever did it in the first place. Everyone makes incomprehensible resolutions such as, "I'll lose 50 pounds!" and "I'll be a happier person." Let me tell you something, you're gonna lose 40 and gain 70; and you'll never be happy, because you're just a self-deprecating loser. No, I'm not bitter. Not bitter at all.

Here are my resolutions: (yeah, I said I wasn't going to make any, but this is me and I can do what I want. So there.)

Stewbie's 2006 New Year's Resolutions

1. I will lose weight. Then I will gain it back. Then I will lose it again. Then I will gain it all back between Halloween and Christmas and I will start over again in January.

2.

3.

4.

Okay, so I couldn't think of any others. Something about not buying shoes popped into my head, but then I started laughing uncontrollably and lost all thought processes.

2 comments:

amy said...

"Not buy shoes"???

What would you have to live for then?

Trinity13 said...

Sounds like my resolution. If I'm not on a diet, I automaticly gain weight. I lose 50 pounds the beginning of the year, then add it all back on again by the time Cmas is over. Then start again in Jan...it never ends!!!